mon journal intime: September 2009

this will never be the way

i am starting to get SICK of everything
i should have listened to the advices, do something prompt enough to make me feel better =)

things will never work one way as i know,
duration and the time how long we have been friends,
will never be a reason for us to keep holding on the bonds

sometimes, i just couldn't take it when the cares are even worse than how an ordinary PASSER-BY
could have given!
i am not comparing, but it's something that i have mentioned endless times =(
i am writing this not because i am piss, i am sick of it! and i know for the time being,
it's really gonna be a time for me to look into everything, and i hope what i thought before was wrong!

appreciation is something that we need and MUST possess
no matter what we are given everyday!
i appreciate u BUT.... think carefully,
do u actually care for ur friend when he needs?

tolerance is also another important part!
i have tried, but did u?
and if u mean it, sorry could have made u be more oblivious of the mistakes,
not repeating the same thing OVER and Over AGAIN
it's already been years! but look at it, everytime when i talk to u!
see how much u really thought through my thoughts!
pause at that moment when i tell u something next time, and observe ur reactions! and think
if this is what u get from someone, will u be happy?

i hope i can keep this best friend after my high school!
but if things remain this way, i dont think i can tolerate anymore...
if u ever know who u are, kindly just talk over to me if u really wanna know what i am thinking!
there's a reason why i am posting here! not because i wanna open a press conference and tell everyone in the world that how much i dislike,
because i know i am true enough when i am facing this computer,
and u will surely read what i typed!

but if u dont, well fine. we will never work out things anymore!

*it drives me a lot a lot of confidence to type this post,
as everyone knows i am soft-hearted.
but this time, head-ache has brought me some confident!

i hope things will get better!

Chicken Soup

phew! finally i have the mood to blog about my days
first of all, i gonna thank to all the readers for paying attention on my blog
thanks for sending sms to me asking how i feel sometimes.
u are honoured and i love u all!

last night, out of the blue, i was missing this best friend a lot
ESTHER TAN HUI
i called her and thank godness! she is free.
we shared the sometime chatting about the past
how we manage to work together for PMR

i really miss the time so so much
i can still remember, we will study together most of the mornings!
around 7 am. and we go to school together
there's a petrol kiosk near her house.
we went there to get some snacks sometimes!!

in school, she was just sitting infront of me
everything was so perfect! TOO FABOLOUS!
we will de-stress and pressurise each other...

well all the moments and past atmospheres began to on AIR again
we smsed each other, while studying
and everything started again!
then i glanced at my table, it was the first picture i took with her in school!!
during form 3, though the colour wasnt that nice anymore.
but both of us have the same photo underneath our desks.

such a coincident, she said i miss u a lot in the photo!
my heaart was MELTED

then i started flipping my calender.
i realised i have exactly 2 months left for spm!
and the worst part is i have only 1 more month to graduate!
hence, all the bad and leaving scenes started to appear.

i couldnt calm myself, as i know it's gonna be a VERY HUGE drastic change in my life
another transition again!
well, i still force myself to concentrate on my studies!
=( i did it. until i read this chicken soup!

some quotes i gonna share
Happiness is a perfume u cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on urself. George Bernard Shaw

When it gets dark enough you can see the stars Lee Salk

Be generous with ur joy! give away what you most want. Be generous with ur insights and delights. Instead of fearing that they're going to slip away and holding on them, SHARE them.. Pema Chodron

to my best friends, appreciate the time left.
dont leave any regrets after high school life
and i gonna admit that i have had a conclusion on my friends list!
this is not what i wanted, but the fact will never be polite to me =)
please.. we gonna treasure every moment with everyone,EVERYBODY will be equally important to US
time will never falls backwards for us.

Happy birthday To HuiShi

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAREST HUI SHI!

thanks for being there for me , always
thanks for being a guidance on my studies and also my feelings' counsellor

have a safe trip to DUBAI,enjoy ur time over there!!

sorry for not attending ur birthday party!
hope u dont mind =)
wish u all the best in the future,
i will never forget the days u helped me!!!
good lucks for everything!!!

Orphan Day!

night scene! my studious look=x and my cute lamp =) and balcony romantic view
mine and daniel's drawings

my dream watches! french connection

long time never been to leisure mall =x

exam has come to an end.
these days, i am seriously exhausted =(
even i wanna wake up early in the morning
my body is totally not allowed.
let's just look at the pics to know more about me!

thanks esther and hui shi! had a great day

Yiruma

YIRUMA- my favourite pianist!

his musics never failed to calm my mind,
let me think positively,
accompany me through my stressful revision period
i have 8 albums of his!

HIGHLY recommended TO those who are about to lose his/her sanity due to stress loads XD
his musics can make u imagine how wonderful things and happenings could be
be positive everyone!

Spot!

New Fairlady XD
one day when i was seriously tired of studying, i decided to cycle around my house.
i was trying to see if any houses have sport cars around here!
then i saw this!!
later i asked my neighbour how much this thing cost!
he says it's cheap. i was like as in how?
200k! i was like O.O better that what i'd expected before.
well.. it's cool ^^

but i still prefer Mercedes Benz!
dont say i am old fashion...

Say no to NS

SuperHuman is back again!
with lots of photos this time =)

thanks to this trial, credits!
everything of me changed.
look at my study table, how messy it is! spot the bottles there,
not because i drink a lot. it's the fact that i always sleep ,study and eat!
after eating, bring one bottle up, after reading, sleep.
wake up to eat, everything goes round and round..=x
see how nerdy i am nowadays!

the draft papers are all over my desk, fulled with notes.
2.30am i sleep almost everynight!
my face is also gonna rot very very soon.
but this trial, honestly it doesnt look like a trial
tips are given, i mean exact questions! =leak!!

english part is funny
everyone started spreading as usual, my inbox will start filling with tips every afternoon
then i was telling my mum, i am not gonna study english tonight because there's nothing to study
except the poems and short stories
then i started receiving essay titles for continous writing.
ANOTHER ONE ! directed writing
godness points are given! how good ah if i can post the tips here to show u all!
TATATATA! the exam questions were changed on that day!

i was like OH MY GOD when i first saw the question paper.
fine, i still write as usual. DISCIPLINE for this time, though i know i am not
my eyebags are starting to get bigger. i am gonna rest more during weekends for next week's papers! tough one coming up!!!

i was a little disturbed by some thoughts these days.
first time in life i feel that stressful!
feel nausea last night, but i drink fruit juice everynight!

this three weeks is also an examination on my another hand!
plse.. prove to me that the outcome will be something i want!!

to everyone of u! goodlucks for ur trial!

and i am clarifying here that i am not super monster,neither super pig!(KNOW who U ARE)
I AM.. er emmm.. look at the first phrase for this post..
GOODNIGHTS!~